


Don't tell Tenzin

by Jxjxjx



Category: Avatar: Legend of Korra
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Heavy Angst, Miscarriage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 01:41:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27086497
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jxjxjx/pseuds/Jxjxjx
Summary: “If you ever hear some say ‘don’t tell Tenzin ’ I dare you not to listen.”
Relationships: Bolin/Opal (Avatar), Lin Beifong/Tenzin, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Pema/Tenzin (Avatar)
Comments: 3
Kudos: 70





	Don't tell Tenzin

"If you ever hear some say 'don't tell Tenzin' I dare you not to listen." This was how Tenzin justified ease dropping to Lin on her private conversation between her and Opal. Opal was having a rough time she had just had a miscarriage. Her and Bolin had been so happy at the idea of having a child, but it wasn't meant to be. Tenzin had been walking to go see if she was alright after he had finished his class. When he overheard, he hadn't known Lin had come over to comfort the poor girl.

"Opal, I Uh, have to tell you this because well I hoped you didn't have considering your mom didn't inherit it." Lin said to her gently. Tenzin could hear some nervousness in her tone.

"What Aunt Lin?" Opal said her voice sounded strong but Tenzin knew she was also trying to make it so.

There was a long moment before Lin continued. "You have to promise to keep it a secret. Don't tell you mom and especially don't tell Tenzin." She enhaphized that last part.

"What? Why?" Opal asked as confused as Tenzin felt. There wasn't much that the two of them didn't know about each other after rekindling their friendship seven years ago.

"You'll understand. Just promised okay?" Lin tells her.

A pause."okay I promise." Opal agreed.

"It's genetic" Lin said quietly, Tenzin had to strain to hear her.

"What? Miscarriages?" Opal asked.

"Yes, my grandmother, Toph's mom had it. It's why they only had one kid." Lin explained. Tenzin knew that Toph had been an only child but he hadn't been aware that they had a history of genetic problems in their family after all both Lin and Su were healthy.

"Okay but are you sure I mean that's only one person" Opal pointed out. "And why is this a secret?"

"Because she was not the only one. I had it too. It's why I never agreed to having kids." Tenzin nearly blew his cover at that news. He had had no idea there was anything other than the fact Lin didn't like kids to her refusal to even talk about the subject.

"Wait what?" Silence Tenzin guessed Lin nodded to her. "Did you-?" The question was unasked but it made Tenzin heart constrict at the thought.

"Yes" Lin's voice was quiet. "The doctors confirmed it. You like me will likely have a very hard time carrying a child. There is a very high chance you will have a miscarriage and you'll have a hard time getting pregnant too." Lin told her. The only thing he could do was gape at the news. He had never even suspected that she had been pregnant before.

"Wait you never told anyone?" Opal guessed. "Tenzin, he never even knew you were pregnant did he?"

"Nope I wasn't completely convinced I was pregnant I was earlier than you." Lin told her. "Katara and Tenzin weren't here. I was waiting until they got back but-" another pause. "It doesn't matter" Tenzin knew what trip she was talking about. It wasn't long before they had started arguing constantly and in a year they broke up. They had gone to visit Uncle Sokka who would die shortly after that trip. Lin had seemed off when they got back but she had said that work had been hell and she had missed him.

"What! Yes it does you shouldn't have to go through that on your own. If Bolin and you and everyone was there for me. I don't know what I'd do." Tenzin found himself nodding along with Opals words. Lin should have told him. How could she had gone through that alone.

"You're a Beifong. You're tough enough." Lin reassured her. "Besides I couldn't hurt Tenzin like that. He would have been so hurt at the loss and Aang was still alive at the time, Katara. I could hurt them like that." Lin's voice was shaky at the end. Tenzin closed his eyes, memories of all the other times she had taken the blame or the pain for him flashed through his mind. From getting blamed for breaking a vase as kids to jumping off Oogi and losing her bending. She had always been the type of person to put her family above herself. He supposed he shouldn't have surprised him that she would have wanted to spare them the pain.

"But it's not your fault." Opal told her firmly. It wasn't.

"I'd still be the one to tell them to break their heart at getting their hopes up. Aang was sick, Katara and Tenzin were worried about him knowing-. I couldn't." Lin sighed.

"Still you should have told someone." A pause. "Is that why you and Tenzin broke up?" Tenzin felt his stomach drop even more at that thought. How could she-

"Yeah, I told him no to kids. Made it clear there was no room on it and well I expected it to end. Didn't make it any easier." She chuckled darkly. Tenzin shut his eyes, he would have never left her had he known. He felt like she wasn't listening to him and that she didn't care about what he wanted because kids for him wasn't just about airbenders, not that she was incapable of having kids.

"Is there still a chance?" Opal asked after a minute.

"Yes, but the odds aren't good kiddo." Lin told her. "You have to think about do you really want to do this multiple times because there is a good chance that if you try again that's what will happen." Lin warned her.

"You're saying it's not worth it" Opal asked in a small voice.

"No, I'm saying think about it, talk with Bolin. It's different, there isn't the fate of a nation hanging over you. I couldn't put Tenzin through that, yes, but it was always more than just the two of us having a kid." Pause "and who knows, maybe medicines have gotten better in 30 years."

Tenzin needed to get out of there, he suddenly felt trapped. All the new information was hitting him like a cement truck. He needed to meditate. Medication didn't help though the thought of having another kid that he had never known that Lin had never known. He and Lin having a kid, that was what was tormenting him the most. He had pictured them with two kids since he was a young man. He had dreamed about that for years and to now learn that that dream had been so ruthless torn to shreds and he had never even known it. He couldn't take it, he needed to talk to her. Tenzin walked up to Lin who was by the house now and dragged her away from talking with Pema and Korra.

"Hey Tenzin!" She protested as Korra and Pema gave them weird looks. But he didn't care, he didn't know what triggered her to follow him but something must have told her to let him pull her along. "Ten what is it?"

They're far from everyone now, no one comes to this part of the island. He just hugs her. They've hugged since they became friends again seven years ago but not like this. He presses his face into her neck pulling her as close as humanly possible. Lin is surprised but hugs him back, rubbing circles into his back in an attempt to comfort him. He tries very hard not to lose his composure.

"I'm sorry" He says finally not yet letting go of her. Part of him doesn't ever want to let go of her.

"About what?" She asks forcing him to lift his head and look at her.

He can see the concern written all over his face. "I overheard you and I dare you not to listen when you hear 'don't tell Tenzin'." he quotes. He knows she is going to be mad that he easedroped but what was he supposed to do.

Recognition dawns on her. "Oh Tenzin" she covers her face with her hand pinching the bridge of her nose. "I wish you didn't" She had quietly.

"What? I wish you told me!" the anger he didn't even know what there exploding out.

"Why? it died anyways" Lin said harshly in retaliation at his anger.

"We had a kid" It was a fact that still boggled his mind.

"No it didn't even have a heartbeat yet!" Lin snapped at him pulling completely away from him.

"Still! You suffered, you were in pain! That's a pain we should have both shared!" Tenzin shouted back at her. "I loved you! I want to share that pain no matter what!"

"No! I protected you! You don't get to blame me for that!" Lin yelled back balling her fists.

"I don't blame you! Do you think I would have left you if I-"

Lin cut him off. "Exactly you needed kids! I couldn't give you that beside I wasn't thrilled with the idea in the first place that's why I hope I was wrong."

"Lin, look around you there are more airbender now than in a 100 years." Tenzin said, spreading his arms his voice resigned and full of pain at the irony.

"We didn't know that then besides your kid helped with that. A kid that I couldn't give you. What if this wasn't always fate? What then?" Lin closed her eyes and shook her head at him.

" I don't know! But I love you, that should be enough." Tenzin snapped at her.

"No it wasn't then and it wasn't in any other universe." Lin smiles sadly at him.

"Lin…"

"I'm sorry Tenzin" She says.

Lin wasn't expecting anyone that night. She had already started drinking after her fight with Tenzin about her misscarriage. She had thought she put that well behind her until this week when she got the news that Opal had had a misscarriage. She had hoped that Su's good genes would mean smooth sailing for Opal but she wasn't that lucky. Tenzin of course just had to overhear which had made the day about a million times more painful. He hadn't understood, she didn't expect him to, but she couldn't have crushed him like that by telling him. It was late when she heard a knock on the door and found him on the other side.

"Please…" was all he said. They didn't need words to understand each other they never had. Lin understood what he was saying, please don't make me go back to a house of four other happy kids and a wife. So she lets him in and offers him the bottle she was drinking out of. He predictably shakes his head. Lin just shrugs leaving the bottle on the counter and heads to the bedroom. He follows her and they lie on top of the cover next to each other for a long while. So long that she hoped that he fell asleep.

"Did you want it?" The question is so quiet she can barely hear it.

She glances over to see him awake. "Yes" she swallows. "I didn't know until I lost it but I did want it." She admits. That might have been the scariest part for her to realize in one moment that she had wanted, was growing to love the bunch of cells inside her and that it would never be born. Tenzin rolled over and pulled her into his chest, curling around her. She could feel him start to cry into her neck and she sooned joined him. 20 years later crying over a baby who was never born.


End file.
